Resolving Conflict Between Friends

For this post, I will like to discuss interpersonal conflict in relation to friendship between two close friends.

With a common interest in Japanese language and culture, Candice and Lisa made plans to study in Japan over a period of a year together. They decided to take a short holiday in Tokyo in order to decide which language school was best suited for their purpose.

Lisa started to notice a number of things about Candice that she had never known before they began traveling. For instance, she was perturbed by Candice's insistence in bringing a lot of stuff with her, even though she was physically incapable of handling the load herself. Candice also spent an excessive amount of time every morning dressing up, often resulting in them falling behind their schedule. When Lisa requested Candice to hurry up, Candice adopted a defensive attitude and started to comment about how Lisa was not paying enough attention to her own appearance. Lisa also grew frustrated with Candice's tendency to over rely on her. For instance, Candice would rely on Lisa to get all the information they need from the language schools, even though she was more proficient in Japanese than Lisa. At the end of the trip, Lisa was convinced that if they were to study together, she would have a miserable time staying together with Candice.

Thus, Lisa was resolved to study in Japan without Candice. When she told Candice about her decision, Candice was upset and claimed that Lisa had betrayed her trust and broken her promise. Eventually, it seemed like the friendship between the two was over.

In such a case, how do you think Lisa could have voiced her decision to Candice, without losing a friend in the process?

My Problem with Communication

Communication has always been a matter that perplexes me, though it is not because I feel that I am totally inept at communication. I have few problems communicating within my inner circle of friends, but once I step just a little bit beyond this boundary, my communication skills may desert me without any notice. Have you ever had those awkward silences while talking to new acquaintances, or people whom you do not know very well? Have you also felt the jitters while addressing a class, and lost your train of thought as a result? It happens quite frequently to me.

Generally speaking, this is not really a problem for me, as I do not need many friends, but prefer having just a few close ones instead. Furthermore, I would rather stay at home and watch a nice drama serial instead of attending big gatherings and being forced to socialize with people whom I am not close with.

On a pragmatic note, however, this lack of communication or socializing skills will be a major problem when I step out into the workplace. Multiple challenges, such as having to forge close working relationships with others, conveying new ideas to clients and colleagues, and networking to obtain useful contacts abound. Thus, what I hope to primarily achieve in this course is to develop a set of communication skills that can help me on both the macro and micro level – for example, presenting to a group of people, as well as communicating with others on a professional basis.

Better communication skills may also allow me to broaden my social circle, despite my inclinations. At the same time, it may be useful for me to build closer relationships with my friends and family. After all, being the social creature that man is, we have to rely on communication to interact with just about everyone around us. Thus, I feel that it is important to better myself on this fundamental skill by taking this course.